You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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