I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
