what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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