Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
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