yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
