So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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