We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
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