Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?