i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
On the way home she put on a necklace with her name on it and wrote my name in sharpie across my chest so that in the morning we could avoid the awkward Idk who the fuck you are conversation. Best. Girl. Ever.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I received a text promising me sex if I drove to Memphis this weekend. Too bad for my penis that we're watching zombie movies and playing cards.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way