Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
