was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
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