Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
Randomize
