she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
