found the other keg... it's in the tree
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
Randomize
