Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
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