yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
Randomize