Say something about gay babies.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
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