How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
I molested 6 butterflies tonight
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
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