Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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