We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I'm sorry I peed on the bushes at your law firm. Is there anyway you could defend me for the ticket I'm about to get?
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
I think you'll appreciate my way of waking up today: Under my cubicle, boxed in by boxes of printer paper, and hung over. I don't even know how the fuck I got in here in the middle of the night. I went to my car and fell back asleep. I'm now 2 1/2 hours late.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
