if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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