I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
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