Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
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