BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
a search helicopter?!
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.