For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
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getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
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I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people