I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
