return my video game
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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