are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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