Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize