I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Randomize
