Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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