hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
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