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• (443): View more from Maryland

  There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.

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• (305): View more from Florida

  It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears

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  23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick

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• (305): View more from Florida

  Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.

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• (587): View more from Alberta

  You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.

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• (727): View more from Florida

  No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".

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• (203): View more from Connecticut

  I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex

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  These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...

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• (443): View more from Maryland

  How's my date look?

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  Like a retarded elf

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  In a good way

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• (513): View more from Ohio

  I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"

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• (862): View more from New Jersey

  I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.

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• (847): View more from Illinois

  If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳

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