Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (203): You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi. http://tfl.nu/yrsa
  Replies (15) Good night (3226) Bad night (668)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (919): Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south. http://tfl.nu/bzzh
  Replies (10) Good night (3015) Bad night (776)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition http://tfl.nu/wv3s
  Replies (10) Good night (665) Bad night (2490)
• Favorite

  (682): View more from Texas

  Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (682): Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight. http://tfl.nu/gbse
  Replies (5) Good night (2594) Bad night (1117)
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (240): When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again. http://tfl.nu/1y07
  Replies (24) Good night (7384) Bad night (1105)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (305): I woke up to him drunk-t-bagging me, saying "huevos rancheros" were being served for breakfast. http://tfl.nu/47xz
  Replies (8) Good night (1581) Bad night (2093)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (727): Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen. http://tfl.nu/2lhp
  Replies (6) Good night (2101) Bad night (767)
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I feel like death gave me a hand job

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): I feel like death gave me a hand job http://tfl.nu/81uy
  Replies (12) Good night (614) Bad night (1624)
• Favorite

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (651): I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar http://tfl.nu/y23q
  Replies (4) Good night (751) Bad night (382)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (706): i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house. http://tfl.nu/5m3i
  Replies (1) Good night (724) Bad night (739)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me http://tfl.nu/ug28
  Replies (7) Good night (1061) Bad night (385)
• Favorite

  (989): View more from Michigan

  Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (989): Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby http://tfl.nu/oj8d
  Replies (6) Good night (622) Bad night (345)
• Favorite

  (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (902): you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation http://tfl.nu/4hrf
  Replies (1) Good night (296) Bad night (532)
• Favorite

  (256): View more from Alabama

  Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (256): Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards. http://tfl.nu/ejyy
  Replies (2) Good night (928) Bad night (266)
• Favorite

  (773): View more from Illinois

  we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (773): we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is. http://tfl.nu/vwba
  Replies (2) Good night (864) Bad night (321)

Randomize