No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
That was before I lit my hair on fire
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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