And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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