I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
