i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
