His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize