Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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