no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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