So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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