i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize