His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Randomize
