I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
