You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I'm gonna have a badass scar
i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
