I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
You're married and I'm going to make out with a stranger tonight. Isn't that weird? It's like a gap in the time space continium.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
