Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
