am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
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