Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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