how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
Swine flu is the new snow day.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
Guess who won bingo at the senior center and is going to jail all in the same night?
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Going to be a long day. text me later. Sorry I puked in your sink.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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