I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.