I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize