i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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